Imi pare rau ca nu am plecat...

Eu unul sunt satul de Romania. A inceput sa imi para rau ca nu am plecat din tara cand am eram mai tanar si aveam mai multe oportunitati. Sunt satul de sistemul medical la care mai nou cotizez mai mult dar al carui buget a ramas acelasi. Buget care oricum nu e folosit pentru noi asiguratii, ci in pare parte sa duce in buzunarele baietilor destepti. Noi suntem prosti, doar cotizam. Platim si roviniete si alte taxe dar la nivel de autostrazi suntem mai rau ca Albania. Nu mai zic de gropi, santuri, cratere care sunt pe toate drumurile. As putea scrie pagini intregi despre cum suntem calcati in picioare in fiecare zi de asa zisul stat roman. As pleca dar e prea tarziu… Pentru copii mei insa nu e tarziu. Ii mai pot salva de mizeria asta. Am sa fac tot posibilul sa le ofer sansa sa traiasca intr-o tara civilizata in care munca si seriozitatea sunt pe primul loc in care impozitele se intorc la cetatean prin servicii medicale, prin invatamant de calitate prin drumuri bune.

Andrei, fiul meu cel mare, termina liceul anul asta. Am hotarat sa aplice la mai multe universitati din afara. Sper ca odata ajuns acolo sa realizeze ce sansa are si sa faca tot posibilul sa isi cladeasca un viitor in acel loc si sa nu isi mai doreasca sa se intoarca acasa. Oricat ar fi de dureros pentru mine, ca parinte, sa il stiu plecat de acasa si sa il vad atat de rar, stiu ca e pentru binele lui si sunt gata sa fac orice sacrificiu. Am inceput deja sa trimitem actele la mai multe institutii de invatamant. Momentan am tradus in engleza situatia lui scolara pentru clasele 9-11, o adeverinta eliberata de liceu in care se specifica cand va avea loc examenul de bacalauret si certificatul lui de nastere. Andrei are inca de anul trecut si un certificat de limba engleza IELTS. Acesta este deja in engleza si nu trebuie tradus. Asteptam saptamanile viitoare raspunsurile facultatilor de afara. In cazul acceptarii vor mai fi cateva acte de tradus printre care si diploma de bacalaureat pe care o vom obtine abia la vara, in iulie. Tot atunci va fi necesara o traducere legalizata care se va depune fizic la dosarul de scolarizare. Momentan am facut doar traduceri autorizate, fara legalizare notariala pe care le-am scanat si le-am trimis online catre universitati.

Maria are abia 14 ani, incepe liceul abia la anul, dar o voi pregati si pe ea din timp pentru pasul asta. Cine stie, poate la batranete o sa scap si eu din Romania si o sa imi traiesc si eu ultimii ani intr-o tara normala alaturi de copiii si nepotii mei.

Sorting Ba's Things

When my mother-in-law, who was called Ba ('mother'), died, I wrote a series of poems about it. I've posted two of them earlier: Journeying and Uses for Wood. Here's another one:

Sorting Ba's Things
Sorting through cupboards in Ba's old room,
I tugged a stuck drawer open,
pulled the string of a small cloth bag, to find
pink and white grins of outgrown false teeth;
in another bag, spectacles, blinking in the light.

And there were her gods and puja implements -
incense sticks, oil lamps with wicks she rolled
out of cotton and ghee, small statues of Krishna,
elephant-headed Ganesh, Lakshmi the wealth-giver,
the book of slokas she chanted every day.

Sunday mornings she watched Mahabharat on TV -
a miracle in every episode - gods' stately progress
through the air, seated on lotus flowers;
towering demons with big bellies and walrus fangs
who laughed "Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!" just before
a hurled fire-discus struck them between the eyes
and they toppled like trees.
Sometimes I sat to watch with her,
and she would say, "Did you see that?!"

Dear Ba, by the end all the sets of teeth hurt you,
you wore them only for photographs,
and the glasses could not make the slokas clear.

May Lakshmi keep you beside her
on the silky petals of her pink lotus.
May Ganesh feed you the sweet ladoo he holds.
And when you are sated and sleepy,
may Krishna soothe you with the song of his flute.

Several Small Things

I have so little to tell these days, it has taken me a week to find a few paragraphs.

The days are still balmy, the evenings breezy, but veyil kalam, the hot season, is sending out warnings: the sharp beam of light that gets between the curtains somehow just after sunrise in the hot season has found the bottom of the bed, and is creeping up toward my eyes. Long twigs have begun to fall on the badminton court: the crows are getting ready to nest again. It’s all so inexorable.

My gardener, who lived in a slum called Thideer Nagar ('thideer' means sudden, or instant, so the name means something like Sudden Town. I assume that it refers to the way slums can come up overnight on empty ground, like a crop of mushrooms) near the Lighthouse, has been shifted along with thousands of his neighbours to a new, government-built slum clearance project in Thoraipakkam, south of the city. He hasn’t turned up for work for two days. Mary, whose son was also shifted, says that the housing is better there. Instead of palm-leaf huts, there are four-story buildings of one-room flats, with electricity and toilets attached (but no water connections indoors). But residents must pay Rs. 250 a month rent, and must take long bus rides to get to work.


An English couple visits Chennai every year at this time. I love them. They’re old enough to be my parents, and I think of them in a confused way as a family/friend combination – an uncle and aunt, perhaps. Coming from a nuclear family of four, I have to guess what extended families are like.

They have just returned from a side-trip to Kuala Lumpur, where they were guests of ‘minor royalty’. They rang up yesterday morning and asked me to drop by their room in one of the clubs here. The club was very pleasant in the morning, full of trees and old, white-painted buildings. Silent, no one around. They gave me a bag containing packets of yeast, rice crackers, several cheeses (dry, sharp cheddar best of all – and Brie and Camembert). We sat and chatted for an hour about their trip, and what the world is coming to, and so on.

In KL they had been guests at a dinner party, where the guests were seated strictly according to social hierarchy. At the head of the table was a Tengku (I don’t know Malaysian nobility, but never mind). Another Malaysian guest, further down the table, had been a senior diplomat, and had lived all over the world. After the dinner was over, someone from higher up the table said of the ex-diplomat, "I don't suppose he ever sat down with Tengkus before."